Life isn’t always easy. In fact, lately it’s been pretty difficult. The Lord has been molding me though many trials and – to be honest – I’m weary. I try to keep in mind the things that I know regarding hardships. I do my best to look for opportunities to learn and I’m thankful for the things that God is teaching me. But after a long while, I begin to feel as though I’m running a race with no end. Let me tell you, that isn’t how I like to work at all. You see, I like to know exactly where to expect the finish line, that way I can tell myself, “not much further now, you’re almost there.” Perhaps I like that so much because thinking of the ending distracts my mind from the current pain. Or perhaps it’s because I cannot fathom the idea of quitting with such a small stretch left. Whatever the reasons, these trials don’t seem to play out the way I’d like them to. And so, with the end nowhere in sight, focusing on the momentary pain is all too easy. Before I know it, I’m stuck in the habit of true self-pity. It is then that I begin to cry, “Why me, Lord?”
But He softly answers, “Because I love you.”
“Well you sure have a funny way of showing it…” I think to myself. And I’m ashamed to say that I even begin to doubt that love.
“But it’s hard.” I cry. “Don’t You see my tears, Father?”
“Hear my prayer, O LORD, And give ear to my cry; Do not be silent at my tears…” -Psalms 39:12
But I know He sees my tears. He sees all things. I also know that He is with me, even in the sorrow.
“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.” -Isaiah 41:10
Yet still I persist and question, “Why do You allow this, Lord?”
And He patiently answers, “Because I love you.”
Oh, How He Loves Me! –
It is then that I begin to study just how much He loves me. I finally focus my eyes on Him – rather than myself – and I’m forced to admit that He really does love me; oh, how He loves me! And for what? What am I that He should even care? How is it that this amazing Deity even knows my name? And yet He knows so much more than my name. He sees my smiles and my tears, my joy and my pain, my love and my anger, my triumphs and my failures. He knows the way I think (kudos to Him for even understanding that!), the way I walk, the way I talk; He even knows how many hairs make up this mane that I claim as mine.
But it isn’t simply His knowing me that proves this amazing love. It’s His sacrifice; the fact that while I was His enemy, He paid the ultimate price to set me free; the fact that He took my place and suffered my punishment, before I even knew Him. That alone would be enough to prove His amazing love for all eternity and yet He doesn’t stop there.
He has blessed me with so many things that I continually take for granted. I have a home, a family, friends, a Bible, heat, food… the list goes on and my gratitude tapers off far too quickly.
So now all of my “why”‘s are transformed into a skeptical, “Why would You love me, Lord?”
And He answers, “Because You’re mine. I am love. And that’s just the way I am.“
A Worthy Distraction –
And so it seems I have taken my eyes off of the sorrow and focused them on quite a worthy distraction. Because, as it turns out, trials are so much easier to bear when your eyes are focused on the love of Christ. No, I won’t say that they’re easy per say. Life is still hard. But when you’re truly convinced of the love that He has for you, it is so much easier to trust Him with the life that you have.
So, my friend, when all else fails, think on His love. Do not let His amazing kindness slip from your memory in the time of your trouble.
Thou my best thought
By day or by night
Waking or sleeping
Thy presence my light
Prone To Doubt –
Sad to say, I cannot escape this post without admitting that my heart is still prone to doubt. I easily allow my eyes to fall away from God’s love and then I begin to question Him once again. How faithless can I be? How patient is He?
And my heart echos the words:
“Lord, I believe; help my unbelief!” -Mark 9:24
Questions To Ponder –
In what ways has God shown you His love and care? Have you taken time to count your blessings lately? Have you fallen into the habit of self-pity as your trials seem to have no end? Can you turn your focus away from self and begin, instead, to focus on His love?
Leave your comment below! 🙂